Should old acquaintances be forgotten, And never brought to mind?

This morning I was reading John 12:24 Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.

The book by Beth Moore talked about that as a child of Christ if part of me has died, in time it would produce many seeds. 

This sparked me to think about the things of the last year. January was pretty rocky…we were living 80miles from He-woods work, about to move, kids were on and off sick, and then we met a birthmom, 3 weeks later cared for her child for 38ish hours then she decided to parent. The rest of 2012 was pretty crazy, trips to see family, a big move, terrible trouble with the renters in our house, and adding our precious We-wood 3!

However, we had a choice about We-wood 3. You see back in January we had the option of not continuing the adoption process. It was hurtful…just as hurtful as our miscarriage before We-wood 1. We choose to continue, we chose not to be bitter and to let the seed that God had planted in our hearts many years prior to grow. We could’ve uprooted that seed and said God I’ve been hurt too much but we didn’t. We tended to the garden, prepared the soil some more, and slowly watered that seed. It was a frustrating seed to grow, slow to grow and at times painful and full of tears. Certainly not lacking in fears either of how the fruit would turn out. 

So for a “resolution” for 2013 I’m going to try to have fertile soil and nourish the seeds that God wants to grow. I will try and not rip those seeds out as weeds when I am frustrated and hurt. I will try my best to not grow bitter to what 2013 throws at me. 

 

My hope is built on nothing less…

“because of the hope laid up for you in heaven. Of this you have heard before in the word of truth, the gospel” Col. 1:5

As I think back over the events that our country has gone through over the past week, I have come to some conclusions and made some observations.  According to many people, our world is coming to an end in just over 24 hours.  If we believe the Mayan prophecy conspiracy theorists, the apocalypse is imminent.  However, we as Christians know that no one knows the day or time when the end of this world will be over.  Also, we are now dealing with living in the wake of the incredible tragedy that occurred in Newtown, CT last Friday.  Such unthinkable evil occurred to such innocent children.  It made me hug my children a little tighter, and wonder at what good God would be able to bring from the situation.

Now there are many people who are saying that all hope is lost and the world is coming to an end.  There are those who will say that God has forgotten us, or that God has turned away from us to let all sorts of bad things happen to us.  But, as I heard a pastor say earlier this week, which God are we talking about?  Are we talking about a god that we can put in our back pocket and bring out to make us happy whenever we want?  Are we talking about a god that we can control and will give us everything we want to make us happy?  Are we talking about a god who bends to our every whim and is solely concerned with making sure that we are comfortable?  Or are we talking about the God and Creator of the universe who is bigger than we could ever imagine, more awesome than we could ever think, and more sovereign than we could ever comprehend?  This is the God whom I worship.  This is the God in whom my hope is found.  As Brother Paul preached tonight from Isaiah 8:17:

I will wait for the Lord, who is hiding his face from the house of Jacob, and I WILL HOPE IN HIM.

I hope in a God who is faithful beyond measure.  I trust, and hope, in a God who teaches me to trust beyond my understanding.  I trust in a God who I have watched bring my wife and I through the process of adoption and see him be faithful to the end as we finalized it legally earlier this week.  I hope in a God who has blessed me with the three greatest kids a dad could ask for.  I hope in a God who blessed me earlier this evening with the incredible privilege of serving communion to my wife.  I hope in a  God who allowed me to experience the joy that my daughters got from picking out gifts for me at Journey and then seeing the joy on their face as I opened the present.  I serve a good God.  I serve a God and hope in a God who loves me and cares for me.  I also know that God allows us to go through tough times, and yes even times of suffering, in order to form us into the image of his son.  As Paul writes in in Romans 5:3-5:

“We rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.”

This is not a god that we can control and manipulate to do as we please.  A god that you can control is a god that is too small to have the power necessary to help you in the first place.  As C. S. Lewis wrote, “He is dangerous, but He is good!”  We, as Christians, serve a good God!  He is more awesome, terrifying and wild than we could ever imagine, but his love for us is more ferocious and fierce than we could ever fathom.

Let’s place our hope in the God of all creation.

Mr. Big Stuff, Who Do You Think You Are?

God has called me to lead His people in worship. I would love nothing more than to be able to lead the people that God has placed me in front of in a way that they don’t experience me, but rather they experience Christ. This is my goal week-in and week-out as I lead here at church and other venues. I dream about creating music that the church can use to voice what Christ is doing in their hearts as an offering of worship back to Him. There is incredible power to be found at the center of a worshiping church that rallies around the cross each week, and I want to be a part of leading people to that experience. I also want to mentor the next generation of believers/worshipers so that long after I have gone on into eternity with Jesus, they are still worshiping the same Creator and Savior.  My identity is found in Jesus and Jesus alone.  It is not in music, an instrument, a certain church, a given preacher, a style, or a preference.  I am first, and foremost, a follower of Christ and worshiper of Him.

In this walk we face many battles

I recently read a blog post about a mom not knowing how brave she would become through the journey of motherhood. This has really echoed with me. Becoming a mother has really helped me gain lots of self-confidence. It has certainly allowed me to use and expand all my medical knowledge, and stretch myself mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. It’s shown me how to self-lessly love someone. To give them the last bite of my favorite dessert, to find more patience than I never imagined having, and to fight for someone so hard even if I didn’t birth them.

I’ve only been a mom for 5.5 years but I can say I wish someone would’ve told me how much I would have to fight in the name of LOVE. I fight monthly to keep $45 set aside for Wee-Wood 1’s ballet class. I vividly recall fighting hard to get Wee-wood 2 readmitted to the ER for the second time in one night when I knew the doctor had a wrong diagnosis. And for two years I fought for Wee-wood 3 just to get here. I fought to explain adoption to those who love us. I fought to grow myself mentally thorough much heartache to become the mom I am today.

Don’t get me wrong I love how hard I have to fight…it’s hard but rewarding. There are very few things that give me the self-confidence that raising kids does. I know I have a long way to go but I’m thankful I learned early on to fight for them and to truly love them.